For me, the lovebombing masked it. The rare occasions where they were super supportive and affectionate and said they loved me? That’s the real them; that’s how they really feel. All the bad stuff is just because they’re really stressed out and I’m not being helpful or good enough. So it’s okay, and I can deal with it.

I was in a really bad headspace. Self-destructive, suicidal, and isolated from everyone but my partner. Even when they eventually escalated to physical violence, I never even considered leaving because they were all I had and they convinced me I was all they had. I literally had no friends or family, no desire to keep living, just a sense of responsibility for their wellbeing. If they hadn’t gotten bored and left me for someone else, I probably never would’ve been able to get myself out.

Doing much better now. Still not great, but at least I have a modicum of self-esteem these days.