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cm0002@literature.cafe to Programmer Humor@programming.dev · 4 days ago

NPM driven development

lemmy.ml

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NPM driven development

lemmy.ml

cm0002@literature.cafe to Programmer Humor@programming.dev · 4 days ago
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  • ¬∃x(∀y(y∈x↔y∉y))@programming.dev
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    3 days ago

    Oh, I’d recognize those parenthesis anywhere. Any sufficiently complicated javascript program contains an ad hoc, informally-specified, bug-ridden, supply-chain-vulnerable, slow implementation of half of Common Lisp.

  • bitjunkie@lemmy.world
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    4 days ago

    Clearly written by some smug [insert language here] dev… Nobody actually working in the JS/TS ecosystem is using var in 2026.

    • undree@lemmy.world
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      3 days ago

      Also commonjs imports

  • xangadix@lemmy.world
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    4 days ago

    Is this functional programming?

    • kunaltyagi@programming.dev
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      4 days ago

      🦋

    • anewfox@lemmy.zip
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      3 days ago

      it’s a js dev that’s discovered ramda but hasn’t realized it yet

  • Enkrod@feddit.org
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    4 days ago

    condition() is undefined, should be ifCondition()

  • onlinepersona@programming.dev
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    3 days ago

    Also known as functional programming.

    • Jankatarch@lemmy.world
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      3 days ago

      But aren’t for-loops a crime against humanity in fp?

      • BetterDev@programming.dev
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        3 days ago

        Not if its treated as an endofunctor

  • gen/Eric Computers@lemmy.zip
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    3 days ago

    var and require()? What is this?

    Come over to modern JavaScript or even Typescript, it’s nice here.

  • gegil@sopuli.xyz
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    4 days ago

    There wouldnt be a ram crisis if nobody needed a 32 gigs of ram in their pc just to run a “hello world” web app.

  • Jankatarch@lemmy.world
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    3 days ago

    Welcome back lisp.

  • anewfox@lemmy.zip
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    3 days ago

    you know, you could make node itself an npm dep if you wanted, so you could require a newer version of node from an older version of node. but then i dunno what you’d do besides invoke it from your node_modules directory.

    maybe just try it on a private npm registry instead of the public one, lol

  • Sanctus@anarchist.nexus
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    4 days ago

    Yeah I write clean readable code, how could you tell?

  • [object Object]@lemmy.ca
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    4 days ago

    And thus, js becomes lisp.

    • Jerkface (any/all)@lemmy.ca
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      3 days ago

      Those who fail to study Lisp are condemned to reinvent it, poorly.

  • Sandbox@lemmy.zip
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    4 days ago

    Coding noob here. What am I looking at? I want to laugh too. :(

    • 42yeah@eviltoast.org
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      4 days ago

      npm, or node js by extension, is famous (infamous?) for having a library for however simple something is to implement. For example a whole library to trim spaces of a string, but only for the left side. Here the joke takes it to the extreme and even import numbers, if conditions, etc., features that are already available in the core language, from external npm libraries, and use that to write a code snippet.

      • BradleyUffner@lemmy.world
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        3 days ago

        My favorite was IsEven. An entire library to tell you if a number is even. And then IsOdd, that does the opposite, which takes IsEven as a dependenxy.

        • filcuk@feddit.uk
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          3 days ago

          Only cowards use the NOT operator

      • Sandbox@lemmy.zip
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        3 days ago

        That’s…amazing haha thank you for your reply!

    • Tartas1995@discuss.tchncs.de
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      4 days ago

      Bad JavaScript Code to make fun of npm.

      But it is just bad code and consequently it weakens the critic that npm deserves.

    • aldhissla@beehaw.org
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      4 days ago

      Everything is from an imported library

      • Sandbox@lemmy.zip
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        3 days ago

        I for one support local libraries. They’re an invaluable resource for the community and I support them 100%

        • aldhissla@beehaw.org
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          2 days ago

          Hehehe, ok.

          Those require lines there, they’re importing code written elsewhere. We call that code a library. Take the first one:

          var zero = require("number-zero");

          defines a variable called zero, imports a library called number-zero (not a real library btw, just a joke), and assigns its value (assumed to be the constant 0) to the variable. Later in line 19, zero is read.

          The joke is that you wouldn’t even write line 2 and use a simple 0 instead of zero in line 19. The code is full of unnecessary imports of basic language components.

  • da_cow (she/her)@feddit.org
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    3 days ago

    The amount of closing braces in line 23 triggers my Lisp PTSD…

  • flango@lemmy.eco.br
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    4 days ago

    standard Javascript experience

    • Tartas1995@discuss.tchncs.de
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      4 days ago

      Only if you write bad js.

    • anewfox@lemmy.zip
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      3 days ago

      ehhh, if something like this passes review, start looking for a new job.

  • Marmotte@jlai.lu
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    4 days ago

    Satan is taking notes…

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