I really appreciate this clarification. Sometimes people wanna vent. Sometimes they want solutions. Hard to tell which especially since most people want both depending on the issue
Presume every time that they are coming from the emotional venting position.
Someone coming from the rational problem solving position will easily ask for solutions… So no risk in getting this wrong. Someone who wants emotional venting tends to blow up if you respond with rational problem solving, high risk with getting this wrong. So the optimal play is to always presume emotional venting if there’s any doubt.
Why don’t you want a solution (even if you’re “just venting”)? If you solved the problem, you wouldn’t need to vent about the thing anymore, because the root cause has been solved.
This is why I start the rants at my husband with “I don’t need a solution for this. So, today…”
I really appreciate this clarification. Sometimes people wanna vent. Sometimes they want solutions. Hard to tell which especially since most people want both depending on the issue
I wish more people would do this. It makes things so much easier.
Presume every time that they are coming from the emotional venting position.
Someone coming from the rational problem solving position will easily ask for solutions… So no risk in getting this wrong. Someone who wants emotional venting tends to blow up if you respond with rational problem solving, high risk with getting this wrong. So the optimal play is to always presume emotional venting if there’s any doubt.
Why don’t you want a solution (even if you’re “just venting”)? If you solved the problem, you wouldn’t need to vent about the thing anymore, because the root cause has been solved.
Some issues are intractable. The behavior and words of other people, for example.