i think I’m cis, don’t really care that much about gender, but i like that I look a bit like Kratos. I’m harry and bald and i like that look. but also love wearing skirts sometimes and looking pretty.
was going to joke about Scottish being my gender. but now I’m contemplating how the construct of gender and the construct of nationality are very similar. both have implied cultures, behaviours, attires, expectations, both assigned at birth, but also can change…
Nationality is a gender!!!?!? Someone ask Judith Butler they are needed for this question
I never really thought about it. Unlike sex which is at least based on the biological, gender is entirely a construct of social expectations and norms. Nationality is the same thing.
Its basically what ever set of signalling traits you adopt. So everything from presentation of sexual dimorphism be it real or artificial, badges of status, recognition cues, etc. Humans are just animals after all and we are no different. Just instead of signaling what pack we are from we do so on a grander scale and signal what nation we are from as well.
So while sex requires chemical alteration to effect in any meaningful way. Your signalling traits can basically be picked up or set down like a set of clothing so long as you know how to coordinate them to match the external expectation.
Which is in a sense the problem. Your signalling traits are ENTIRELY for the benefit of others not yourself. At least in a sense, and the more i think of it likely a good chunk of the reason humans suffer so hard from body and gender dysphoria. Being a social animal we desire that our signalling traits accurately reflect what we self perceive so that others in turn reflect back the proper expectations onto us so they align.
The misalignment causes stress.
I might just be way too fucking tired and over thinking this at this point tho. I need a stronger drink. lol
You don’t need to settle sweetie. Keep exploring and following what makes you happy. I was hairy and bald a year ago and now I am a beautiful girl. Anything is possible if you’re gay enough.
i took no offense of being told I might be an egg.
I get it can get a bit gender essentialism to imply that certain traits belong to one gender and wanting those means you might be interested in the rest.
I’m sorry, some of it comes from me having said so much to myself over and over and over… and it was because I was avoiding it. But you’re right, of course, better to have kept that to myself even though I had that feeling. I’ll keep that in mind in the future, thank you.
It’s a common problem among a lot of oppressed and minority communities to not realize they have their own problem with casual hate. Its a byproduct of so many of the coping mechanism that are needed to deal with the hate in the first place.
All we can do is point it out to each other and try to be better. As the saying goes hate breeds hate.
Your doing great, and your a better person then you think. Just being able to accept and try to be the better person is hard.
Now that’s some egg talk if I’ve ever heard it. jk hehe 😜
i think I’m cis, don’t really care that much about gender, but i like that I look a bit like Kratos. I’m harry and bald and i like that look. but also love wearing skirts sometimes and looking pretty.
I’ll settle with being a fruity guy.
So what your saying is your Scottish at heart?
was going to joke about Scottish being my gender. but now I’m contemplating how the construct of gender and the construct of nationality are very similar. both have implied cultures, behaviours, attires, expectations, both assigned at birth, but also can change…
Nationality is a gender!!!?!? Someone ask Judith Butler they are needed for this question
I never really thought about it. Unlike sex which is at least based on the biological, gender is entirely a construct of social expectations and norms. Nationality is the same thing.
Its basically what ever set of signalling traits you adopt. So everything from presentation of sexual dimorphism be it real or artificial, badges of status, recognition cues, etc. Humans are just animals after all and we are no different. Just instead of signaling what pack we are from we do so on a grander scale and signal what nation we are from as well.
So while sex requires chemical alteration to effect in any meaningful way. Your signalling traits can basically be picked up or set down like a set of clothing so long as you know how to coordinate them to match the external expectation.
Which is in a sense the problem. Your signalling traits are ENTIRELY for the benefit of others not yourself. At least in a sense, and the more i think of it likely a good chunk of the reason humans suffer so hard from body and gender dysphoria. Being a social animal we desire that our signalling traits accurately reflect what we self perceive so that others in turn reflect back the proper expectations onto us so they align.
The misalignment causes stress.
I might just be way too fucking tired and over thinking this at this point tho. I need a stronger drink. lol
You don’t need to settle sweetie. Keep exploring and following what makes you happy. I was hairy and bald a year ago and now I am a beautiful girl. Anything is possible if you’re gay enough.
It’s kind of insulting to imply that a cisdude can’t want close social bonds and physical contact. And that they are an egg just for wanting it.
We all deserve to be loved. Its not exclusive to being trans or queer.
I know your joking but it grinds at me how casual and common people say that sort of thing entirely seriously.
:/
i took no offense of being told I might be an egg.
I get it can get a bit gender essentialism to imply that certain traits belong to one gender and wanting those means you might be interested in the rest.
I’m sorry, some of it comes from me having said so much to myself over and over and over… and it was because I was avoiding it. But you’re right, of course, better to have kept that to myself even though I had that feeling. I’ll keep that in mind in the future, thank you.
Don’t beat yourself up over it.
It’s a common problem among a lot of oppressed and minority communities to not realize they have their own problem with casual hate. Its a byproduct of so many of the coping mechanism that are needed to deal with the hate in the first place.
All we can do is point it out to each other and try to be better. As the saying goes hate breeds hate.
Your doing great, and your a better person then you think. Just being able to accept and try to be the better person is hard.
Stay safe and stay strong.