Piling on to your hobbies beef, it also implies that you’re going to have hobbies that aren’t inherently gendered. I am not trying to be sexist at all or prescriptive about which hobbies people should engage in, I’m just going to issue an observation that all of my husband’s video gaming friends are men, and 80% of the people in my gardening groups are women. He’s also into music, which is probably more mixed, but everyone I talk to about books also ends up being women… But that could also just be the genre.
I will say I may somewhat break the mold on this, I’d probably love a gardening group. Unfortunately there’s also people like me who’s (current, maybe gardening group tho good idea) hobbies aren’t conducive to meeting people at all. Like I like to walk around in the woods and take pictures of shit mostly, smoke a lil herb while I’m there. Sometimes I can meet dudes who wanna smoke but I avoid women out there because I’m no bear lol, I don’t want to freak anyone out y’know? I do also read but nobody really talks about books at all ime (irl anyway). Like if I did do the spyware apps I’m sure “what’re you reading right now” would be a good opener but like at the book store or library (where I’d actually be) seems inappropriate.
Even walking in the woods smoking/photoing, that’s a great date activity, have a botanical garden nearby that’s nature but still public and safe too which is even better, but I can’t meet them there I have to talk to someone somewhere else and be like “hey I’m going this weekend you wanna tag along” and that’s the part that is difficult when nobody wants to talk to anyone except in places where I’m not.
There are absolutely hiking groups. They’re are even hiking groups geared towards single people. I have friends that met SOs through them. Also, I think something like a book club would be most likely to be organized through another organization first (a large workplace, a Facebook group or Reddit sub geared towards a city/ county) that would start as a discussion forum and move on to in-person get-togethers.
And if you don’t come across any of those maybe you live in a small community and need to look within the next larger community. And don’t be afraid to organize it yourself. People like all those things (hiking, gardening, books). Also, re: nature and gardening, you can usually also volunteer with local nature preserves (our country has a local conservatory). Good luck out there!
Huh, I’ll check out if there’s any in my area. No go on the workplace, and I do neither the spyware dating apps nor the spyware spying apps (what else does facebook do really it’s all spying all the way down) nor reddit, I’m here partially because reddit chased me off when they killed 3rd party apps after all and lemmy dating isn’t a thing. Also tbh I have ADHD bad and have a hard time reading something unless I pick it, and even then I’m not afraid to say “nah this one’s no good” and not finish it lol, not sure I’m book club material, more “talk about the books we’re currently hyperfocused on” material haha.
I’m in a moderate city, it’s possible we have hiking groups I’m unaware of, I just hope I can find them without facebook because I do not have one, I’ll look, thanks!
Indeed, I left Reddit because it was clearly becoming another tool of manipulation. Facebook feed is very similar. I am not as politically left as a lot of Lemmy, but I am still on the left, and my Facebook feed ends up full of conservative propaganda.
Anyway, the only reason I still maintain a Facebook account is because so much of my local community/ county organizing ends up being done through Facebook. And at the end of the day, you are safer having a community than not, even if the oligarchs know who I know and what shoes I buy.
Piling on to your hobbies beef, it also implies that you’re going to have hobbies that aren’t inherently gendered. I am not trying to be sexist at all or prescriptive about which hobbies people should engage in, I’m just going to issue an observation that all of my husband’s video gaming friends are men, and 80% of the people in my gardening groups are women. He’s also into music, which is probably more mixed, but everyone I talk to about books also ends up being women… But that could also just be the genre.
I will say I may somewhat break the mold on this, I’d probably love a gardening group. Unfortunately there’s also people like me who’s (current, maybe gardening group tho good idea) hobbies aren’t conducive to meeting people at all. Like I like to walk around in the woods and take pictures of shit mostly, smoke a lil herb while I’m there. Sometimes I can meet dudes who wanna smoke but I avoid women out there because I’m no bear lol, I don’t want to freak anyone out y’know? I do also read but nobody really talks about books at all ime (irl anyway). Like if I did do the spyware apps I’m sure “what’re you reading right now” would be a good opener but like at the book store or library (where I’d actually be) seems inappropriate.
Even walking in the woods smoking/photoing, that’s a great date activity, have a botanical garden nearby that’s nature but still public and safe too which is even better, but I can’t meet them there I have to talk to someone somewhere else and be like “hey I’m going this weekend you wanna tag along” and that’s the part that is difficult when nobody wants to talk to anyone except in places where I’m not.
There are absolutely hiking groups. They’re are even hiking groups geared towards single people. I have friends that met SOs through them. Also, I think something like a book club would be most likely to be organized through another organization first (a large workplace, a Facebook group or Reddit sub geared towards a city/ county) that would start as a discussion forum and move on to in-person get-togethers.
And if you don’t come across any of those maybe you live in a small community and need to look within the next larger community. And don’t be afraid to organize it yourself. People like all those things (hiking, gardening, books). Also, re: nature and gardening, you can usually also volunteer with local nature preserves (our country has a local conservatory). Good luck out there!
Huh, I’ll check out if there’s any in my area. No go on the workplace, and I do neither the spyware dating apps nor the spyware spying apps (what else does facebook do really it’s all spying all the way down) nor reddit, I’m here partially because reddit chased me off when they killed 3rd party apps after all and lemmy dating isn’t a thing. Also tbh I have ADHD bad and have a hard time reading something unless I pick it, and even then I’m not afraid to say “nah this one’s no good” and not finish it lol, not sure I’m book club material, more “talk about the books we’re currently hyperfocused on” material haha.
I’m in a moderate city, it’s possible we have hiking groups I’m unaware of, I just hope I can find them without facebook because I do not have one, I’ll look, thanks!
Indeed, I left Reddit because it was clearly becoming another tool of manipulation. Facebook feed is very similar. I am not as politically left as a lot of Lemmy, but I am still on the left, and my Facebook feed ends up full of conservative propaganda.
Anyway, the only reason I still maintain a Facebook account is because so much of my local community/ county organizing ends up being done through Facebook. And at the end of the day, you are safer having a community than not, even if the oligarchs know who I know and what shoes I buy.