No, no, as a fellow velocirap er… human being, I tell you it’s ok to say you hate all men. Because it’s extremely easy to prove you are not an absolute POS and therefore be an exception to the rule. You just need to be a decent human being and poof you’re an exception to the rule of “I hate all men”. Because that rule is referred to the majority of assholes that roam around, not to every single man without exception.
Edit: I love the amount of people angry at me because I said that the only thing a man has to do to not be in the “hated list” is to be a decent human being as if I were asking them to climb the fucking Everest barehanded.
I tell you it’s ok to say you hate all black people. Because it’s extremely easy to prove you are not an absolute POS and therefore be an exception to the rule. You just need to be a decent human being and poof you’re an exception to the rule of “I hate all black people”. Because that rule is referred to the majority of assholes that roam around, not to every single black person without exception.
Edit: I love the amount of people angry at me because I said that the only thing a black person has to do to not be in the “hated list” is to be a decent human being as if I were asking them to climb the fucking Everest barehanded.
Honestly, changing the saying to “I hate most men” is a really minor change and would cover for criticism from those asshole men. And it makes more sense for our usage.
They are already refusing to change though. “I hate all men” clearly it’s really winning them over, and it just makes it easier to discredit us as misandrists.
Everything is becoming so polarized that we are losing nuance. If we ever want to actually change things for the better, we have to stop reaching for the easy slogans and bring the nuance back.
In a similar manner, it’s long been a consideration within black communities the ways that black men get targeted in ways unique – though particular – from black women, for being both black and male, and how purportedly generalized anxieties about men will often get triggered with frequency towards black men and then lean on racism to ensure some sort of consequence is enacted to quell that anxiety.
They’re right, I understand how women are victimized. That’s not an excuse to internalize bigotry and it is an issue you should work on.
This is not defending the men who do victimize women of which there are many, it’s a stance against generalizations and the inbuilt prejudices they normalize in culture.
I know this argument all too well because I’ve heard it used too many times by racists.
Look, I don’t have to work on making men become decent towards women.
As I’ve explained, it’s extremely easy to become an exception to the present rule yet you are getting concerned about me hating the whole male collective because I said that all you need to do to not be hated is simply being a decent human being.
Do you think it’s hard for the men collective to achieve the goal of being decent human beings and that’s why you are so concerned?
You don’t have to work on that, but you do have to work on yourself. What you said is an example of internalised misogyny, and it is part of the problem.
I’m very sorry for the actions of some men, but neither of us can control that. What we can control is how we react to it.
It’s not the fact that you’re saying men should change; it’s the fact that you’re generalising.
By saying that all men are evil, you’re letting individual men off the hook, and you’re perpetuating the very problem you claim to be fighting against.
No one should have to prove they’re an exception to a hateful statement.
I understand and validate your feelings, which is why I care so much about telling you about the misogyny you’ve internalised.
I don’t see you as a prejudiced bitch; I see someone who has been victimised and hurt, and who has turned that hurt into something that will harm you and other women.
I understand it’s exhausting, and I don’t mean to attack. I just want to see you heal. Don’t you think this has taken enough from you?
No one should have to prove they’re an exception to a hateful statement.
If you think that being a decent person towards other humans is “proving yourself” then I don’t know what to tell you. That’s the bare minimum in human convivence, yet we are discussing about my mysoginy because I dared to say that if a man is a POS towards women, he’s going to be hated.
Plenty of men will quickly agree that men suck. If they they don’t, they’re either extremely naivë, from a different culture where men being awful isn’t the norm, or they’re not an exception for good reason.
As a man, I’ve been mistreated by men, both while I was growing up and in adulthood. Nobody ever cared about my problems or trauma because when they look at me all they see is “Man = Privileged” and they don’t care about my problems, emotions, or well-being. Clearly they’ve never read bell hooks if they think that makes them a feminist.
It’s always the oppression olympics: “No, you can’t have any problems or trauma, because what about all these other people whose problems and trauma are worse.” This isn’t a fucking competition, dude. Patriarchy hurts men too, and it doesn’t justify misandry.
“Stick it to the man” means “the authorities and arbitrary structures of power,” not “some random dude down the street because he has no friends and that makes him an easy target.”
Are you responding to the wrong person? If you are just looking for a place to stick your point, then cool.
I agree that it sucks that awful people dismiss the problems of others for reasons as stupid as gender. Anyone who uses their own trauma or disadvantages to try to shutdown others talking about their own problems are also bad.
Also, if anything I’m also a victim of those mechanism of how patriarchy hurts men? So yeah. It’s not great.
And yet despite all of the things we seem to agree on, I still feel men suck and I think more men should be saying it.
No, no, as a fellow
velociraper… human being, I tell you it’s ok to say you hate all men. Because it’s extremely easy to prove you are not an absolute POS and therefore be an exception to the rule. You just need to be a decent human being and poof you’re an exception to the rule of “I hate all men”. Because that rule is referred to the majority of assholes that roam around, not to every single man without exception.Edit: I love the amount of people angry at me because I said that the only thing a man has to do to not be in the “hated list” is to be a decent human being as if I were asking them to climb the fucking Everest barehanded.
Give me a damn break…
Here is why what you’re saying is problematic:
Does this sound okay to you?
Hating people because of their gender is bigotry, and if you use “all” to mean “most” that is a misuse of language
You must be one of those getting offended when women pick the bear in the forest, huh?
Honestly, changing the saying to “I hate most men” is a really minor change and would cover for criticism from those asshole men. And it makes more sense for our usage.
Meh, easier to get mad at you and refuse to change because they can’t possibly be making a mistake
Exactly the same as when they say “all men are dangerous” instead of “all unknown men have the potential to be dangerous”
They are already refusing to change though. “I hate all men” clearly it’s really winning them over, and it just makes it easier to discredit us as misandrists.
Everything is becoming so polarized that we are losing nuance. If we ever want to actually change things for the better, we have to stop reaching for the easy slogans and bring the nuance back.
But then less men would self-identify as assholes in the responses.
Don’t worry, they will find a way to show us they are assholes. They always do.
There is real blowback to marginalized people with these shorthands, though: https://www.tumblr.com/luckyladylily/752119106260615168/so-a-few-months-ago-there-was-the-discourse-about.
In a similar manner, it’s long been a consideration within black communities the ways that black men get targeted in ways unique – though particular – from black women, for being both black and male, and how purportedly generalized anxieties about men will often get triggered with frequency towards black men and then lean on racism to ensure some sort of consequence is enacted to quell that anxiety.
…clever girl.
You must be a blast at parties. So hateful.
Is it difficult for you becoming an exception like I mentioned in my comment?
I’m deeply sorry for pointing out your prejudice.
No, no, it’s fine. I’m ok with people thinking I’m a prejudiced bitch because I think decent men are an exception and not the general rule.
Glad you make exceptions when you find “one of the good ones”
“You’re a credit to your gender!”
They’re right, I understand how women are victimized. That’s not an excuse to internalize bigotry and it is an issue you should work on.
This is not defending the men who do victimize women of which there are many, it’s a stance against generalizations and the inbuilt prejudices they normalize in culture.
I know this argument all too well because I’ve heard it used too many times by racists.
Look, I don’t have to work on making men become decent towards women.
As I’ve explained, it’s extremely easy to become an exception to the present rule yet you are getting concerned about me hating the whole male collective because I said that all you need to do to not be hated is simply being a decent human being.
Do you think it’s hard for the men collective to achieve the goal of being decent human beings and that’s why you are so concerned?
You don’t have to work on that, but you do have to work on yourself. What you said is an example of internalised misogyny, and it is part of the problem.
I’m very sorry for the actions of some men, but neither of us can control that. What we can control is how we react to it.
It’s not the fact that you’re saying men should change; it’s the fact that you’re generalising.
By saying that all men are evil, you’re letting individual men off the hook, and you’re perpetuating the very problem you claim to be fighting against.
No one should have to prove they’re an exception to a hateful statement.
I understand and validate your feelings, which is why I care so much about telling you about the misogyny you’ve internalised.
I don’t see you as a prejudiced bitch; I see someone who has been victimised and hurt, and who has turned that hurt into something that will harm you and other women.
I understand it’s exhausting, and I don’t mean to attack. I just want to see you heal. Don’t you think this has taken enough from you?
If you think that being a decent person towards other humans is “proving yourself” then I don’t know what to tell you. That’s the bare minimum in human convivence, yet we are discussing about my mysoginy because I dared to say that if a man is a POS towards women, he’s going to be hated.
Apparently it’s difficult for you.
Plenty of men will quickly agree that men suck. If they they don’t, they’re either extremely naivë, from a different culture where men being awful isn’t the norm, or they’re not an exception for good reason.
As a man, I’ve been mistreated by men, both while I was growing up and in adulthood. Nobody ever cared about my problems or trauma because when they look at me all they see is “Man = Privileged” and they don’t care about my problems, emotions, or well-being. Clearly they’ve never read bell hooks if they think that makes them a feminist.
It’s always the oppression olympics: “No, you can’t have any problems or trauma, because what about all these other people whose problems and trauma are worse.” This isn’t a fucking competition, dude. Patriarchy hurts men too, and it doesn’t justify misandry.
“Stick it to the man” means “the authorities and arbitrary structures of power,” not “some random dude down the street because he has no friends and that makes him an easy target.”
Are you responding to the wrong person? If you are just looking for a place to stick your point, then cool.
I agree that it sucks that awful people dismiss the problems of others for reasons as stupid as gender. Anyone who uses their own trauma or disadvantages to try to shutdown others talking about their own problems are also bad.
Also, if anything I’m also a victim of those mechanism of how patriarchy hurts men? So yeah. It’s not great.
And yet despite all of the things we seem to agree on, I still feel men suck and I think more men should be saying it.
It’s more accurate to say that patriarchal culture sucks rather than men in general.