#7 lol
Don’t say: “I quit”
why? Quitting demonstrates that you are not passionate about your role
Say: “I exist to serve the company”
“I cleared bandwidth to lead a higher impact project”
No, don’t say that! Say “I hurkledurked the dooper bobble.” It means exactly the same thing (nothing,) but using the business jargon of the 2030s so you stay ahead of the trend.
They have a point though. They are telling you to phrase things in a way that makes you look better.
How does speaking like a braindead MBA make you look better?
Everyone likes to shit on MBA language, but it’s simply the language of a subculture.
I know exactly what freeing up bandwidth to work on a higher priority project means. It’s not nonsense. Sure, they could say they “sent useless work to the intern so they could do something more important”. But that’s not the language the culture uses.
What’s next, are we going to shit on ebonics too? How about shitting on tech speak? It’s not any less incomprehensible to those outside the bubble.
Anyway, that’s not to you specifically, just this whole thread reeks of a superiority complex.
/rant
You’re comparing:
- A group of English dialects spoken by an ethnic group
- A field that has technical terms with precise meaning
- A manufactured group of buzzwords largely appropriated from real technical terms meant to obscure meaning to outsiders and sometimes even hide criminal activity
These are not the same. And none of those are a subculture.
Why does the illustrated woman on the list look like the stonks meme?
SLAVRY
❌ Don’t say: ‘I don’t want a promotion’.
❔Why: you do want to work more for a proportionally small salary increase.
✅ Say: ‘I will be pleased to eat shit now both ways for a couple more dollars’.
Executive turned executive coach = They got fired and couldn’t find a job, so now they say their a coach and try to scam people with useless advice.
100% I’ve seen it happen
