Rest… and how demotivated I am at work.
I am 100% one of those people that other folks think is “ambitious” but honestly I just say what I think people want to hear about my career aspirations or whatever, and I don’t seem to understand what level of effort folks put into their work so I just burn myself out by trying to keep all the damn plates spinning.
This general issue mixed with some recent comments by our CEO as well as overall policy things just makes me hate my job. I joined this company because there was a huge focus on people first. It was a great culture with high camaraderie and management seemed to care (or at least to do things that made it seem like that), but over the last two years it’s like the claws of our US overlords have really dug in and we are now America-lite* as an entity.
So I am tired, and I am tired of pushing myself to this point and yet I can’t seem to stop myself. When I am working I don’t feel like it’s acceptable to let anything drop, so instead I am just irritable and miserable when I finish work until I have a good bit of *dissociation time*
*nb I am American but have lived in the UK for 13 years now and this particular regression toward American-style workplaces really gets to me.
Appreciate the support ❤️
Loads of folks in the same mental boat, but we’ve had about 10 leavers (~25%) of the core team that was there when I started in the last 18 months.
I have started applying for stuff but finding a new job right now is such a mess as well 😅😅