• velma@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      14 days ago

      That’s very true. They also don’t seem very extreme when you’re inside of the abusive relationship. A lot of these get normalized.

      • SharkWeek@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        14 days ago

        I remember going to relationship counselling, and literally in the first session the counselor went into very - carefully - spoken - professional mode and said that they were unable to help us while that sort of thing was going on.

        I was surprised, because I didn’t think any of it was that bad, and certainly not a patch on my previous bad relationship.

        • velma@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          14 days ago

          I’m sorry you were in that situation and congrats on getting out!

          That was a really responsible counselor. It’s very dangerous to attend therapy or counseling with abusive partners because they end up learning new ways of manipulating their victims.

          I only started to realize the situation I was in after I had my kid. Having the perspective of seeing how I was treated through their eyes helped me finally leave. I’ve never been happier :)

          • SharkWeek@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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            13 days ago

            Yeah, that was definitely one of the final nails in the coffin, looking back.

            Well done to you, too - getting through that sort of emotional meatgrinder is harder than most people think. I hope you and your sprog are doing well now :-)

    • Malyca@lemmy.zip
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      13 days ago

      It gets worse :( this is why us older ladies try to warn the younger ones so hard. Though it really applies to both genders